The Summerland Advocate-Messenger - Reliable, Trustworthy Reporting, Capturing The Heartbeat Of Our Community

Walt Disney once said, “There’s no magic in magic. It’s all in the details.”

I have a feeling Walt’s magical wisdom applied to people, too.

If you’re lucky enough to have an edge when it comes to reading people, you’ve more than likely mastered the art of the details - paying attention to tiny clues that provide huge amounts of data about others.

Take a moment and think about your best friend. What about them stands out? What do they do that continues to build on your friendship?

Now, think about individuals you avoid at all costs and why you keep your distance.

Can you visualize the reasons that set people apart?

It all comes down to the details. Here’s my list of what sets people apart.

Politeness. I credit my parents with drilling the “treat others how you want to be treated” mantra into my mind. Good manners make all the difference in the world. It’s a sign of empathy and that’s an attractive quality.

Confidence. Narcissists not welcome. There’s a huge divide between confidence and false bravado. Having confidence shows you’re comfortable in your own skin and accepting of others in any situation. A healthy dose of confidence shows you aren’t afraid to tackle something new, you adapt and are willing to take chances.

Pressure. Do you cave when the going gets tough? Or, do you dig in and problem solve. How you react when the going gets tough mirrors how you handle life’s dilemmas.

Support. How do you react when others receive good news? Do you offer sincere congratulations or do you negate their accomplishments?

Response. I’m guilty of this. When asked, “How are you,” I typically respond with “I’m good,” even if things aren’t going well. How boring. If someone takes the time to ask, don’t go overboard with negativity, but be truthful. It’s a great conversation starter and one trait I am going to work on.

Language. As a journalist, I spend a lot of time listening. One interesting element is hearing how others define their lives, their roles in society, their responsibilities. Words tell a valuable story, so make sure you choose your words wisely and make sure they are truthful.

Integrity. Your treatment of other individuals tells a lot about your moral compass. Belittling others and exerting purported power, more than likely, camouflages a lack of self-respect.

Mentally reading details of a situation or during an encounter with an individual helps you tune in and realize which individuals you tend to gravitate toward. More than likely, they mirror attitudes you have.

And that’s a good detail.

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Genealogy update: It’s been the best of times and the worst of times. I discovered information about my great-grandmother, including her maiden name, which was misspelled on the marriage certificate.

But, it seems like my great-grandfather vanished without a trace, like Grandma Larson asserted.

I have discovered he was quite an entrepreneur when he lived in Wausa. He built a miniature golf course, which triggered some memories from Dad.

He also raised American Poland-China hogs, and seemed quite successful, according to the association’s record books.

I’ll keep digging.

A supposed dead end can’t keep an investigative reporter from doing her job.

Wish me luck!