Around a month ago, I got a much needed haircut. The day before my appointment, I mentioned it in passing to the residence life office assistant as I picked up the mail. I disclosed that it was my first time getting my haircut at this place, so the end result could be interesting.

The office assistant replied with a statement along the lines of, “Well, they say there is nothing more honest than a child or a drunk.”

After a quick chuckle, I realized how accurate that statement was -more so about a child’s honesty.

At the time this conversation took place, I was still completing my special education practicum, so I was working with younger students fairly often. While I already realized the brutal honesty children can spew, I forgot how refreshing the honesty was.

While I wish they would spare the overly specific details about what happened in the bathroom, I appreciate how open and willing they are to honestly share.

After a brief consideration of childhood honesty and innocence, the real question hit me: When and why do we lose the capability to be brutally honest?

All throughout elementary school, the concept of “honesty is the best policy” is prevalent. However, somewhere along the line, this idea is lost.

The need for deception seems paramount itself as life becomes more ambiguous.

The real question presents itself as is the absence of honesty a skill that is learned or taught?

In my opinion, I believe it is a combination of both.

Over time, we observe behavior from others that depicts lying and deception as acceptable modes to escape accountability. This is the behavior that blindly teaches honesty as something that is a choice.

However, we also learn through difficult interactions that escaping honesty through lying is easier.

Instead of being upfront and telling the truth, which is difficult, we tell the opposing party what they want to hear.

Over time, the acquisition of this skill becomes permanent and we rely heavily on the art of deception.

Whether the lack of honesty is learned or taught, it is obviously an issue in American society.

Instead of telling people what they want to hear—lying—we need to tell them what they deserve to hear—the truth.

While honesty is not always easy, the old saying is true; it is “the best policy.”

In reflection, it does not matter if the lack of honesty is a learned or taught skill. The only piece that matters is we identify what can be done to ensure honesty is always the first step. No matter how old you are, it is time we all reach back and find that innocent, brutally honest child in ourselves. Find it and protect it at all costs.